Which hurts more: not getting what you expected to receive or getting something you did not want and expect to receive?
Last time (the post before the most recent post) I mentioned about my exemption in my Chemistry finals. Well, guess what?
I wasn’t exempted after all.
When my professor showed me my real grade this afternoon, I was shocked, devastated (though I hid my feelings pretty well or else I would have bawled in front of him) and…regretful. I did not realize until I saw my grade that I was flunking chem (at least in my standards, which are pretty high). I cannot believe I performed poorly in my favorite science. Now I’m starting to think maybe chemistry and I never really had…well, chemistry. 😐
By the power vested in me by the Holy Spirit, I was able to keep my cool and saltwater intact in my tear ducts as my friends came up to me and made sure I was okay. Thankfully I did not complain, but at that time and even a few hours later when I got home, I was on the verge of complaining about my sudden misfortune and blaming my professor for misreading my grade. I am still thinking twice if I should take the finals because I need to reach my 93% cut-off mark or more in order to maintain or slightly improve my grade. The fact that I’m already in summer mode and that I still have 2 finals left to ace (although I’m surprisingly exempted–for real–from the other exam, which is Math).
When disappointments come my way, I am always reminded of these 3 Biblical principles:
- Your response is your responsibility – Whenever we face something difficult, we can respond in one of two ways: remain bitter and allow it to sink in our system or surrender your hurts and burdens to God and allow Him to work for you.
- Romans 8:28 – God is in control of my life no matter what happens
- What you sow is what you reap
The last point was the most difficult principle to accept because it involved my past mistakes. I knew that I slacked off this semester and cut several classes. I spent more time studying my Facebook wall than my chemistry lessons. I may blame about anything such as the professor’s teaching style and personality, but I would never win because I fought unprepared. The second semester was an avenue for hard work, and when judgement day came, I failed.
Whenever we face difficult and unexpected situations, we feel tempted to complain, nag and harbor bitterness so much so that we quit the task, subject or work. After what happened to me today, I realized that the only cure to this kind of struggle is surrender and humility. Letting go does not mean letting it flutter until you can’t see it anymore; letting go means loosening your grip on loose and lifeless living and taking hold of quality life. Let God, because the power and the values itself come from Him. “Without Me, You are nothing.”
When the negative expectations come your way, remember that God must be calling you to have an appointment with Him. God speaks to those who take time to listen. Are you going to meet with Him? 😀